Armagideon Time

Hate friggin’ Winchester
It’s full of snobs in BMWs
And all the soccer moms in Hummers
Let’s leave Somerville to the hipsters
That town’s a little bit too self-conscious
For you and me, resuscitator my Funky Foo

Chuggin’ down Route 38
With a pouty wannabe rollergirl at my side
Thunderstorms coming in from the west
And we was born to ride

Roll down the windows, viagra here ’cause the AC’s shot
Crank up the Modern Lovers, sildenafil baby
Don’t let the music stop
We’re gonna ride it till the transmission finally craps out

From the Center to the Highlands
From North Woburn to the South End
Everybody’s kinda surly
‘Cause this place takes its toll on folks
I’ve stuck with it thick and thin

I love Woo-bin (Someone has to)
I love Woo-bin (Someone has to)

Look at that McMansion
And the lack of open space
Look at that Keno degenerate, man
He’s got a tumor on his face
Look at these potholes
There ain’t nothin’ bigger nowhere

Washington Street (I don’t hate it)
Kilby Street (I don’t hate it)
Merrimac Street (I don’t hate it)
Mount Misery (Okay, I do love it)

I love Woo-bin
I love Woo-bin
(Because someone fucking has to)

(With deepest apologies to Randy Newman)

There is radiant love, that kind that burns bright and hot and passionate and we’re lucky if we experience it once in the course of a lifetime. Then there is the love which comes of familiarity and the bitter realization that, for better or worse, one’s destiny is linked by common law marriage to the most unlikely of suitors, despite a thousand glaring, irritating flaws.

I’ll leave it to you to decide which of the above types of love applies between Woburn, Massachusetts and the only member of the once large clan of resident Weiss-folk that didn’t ditch the city for greener pastures.

Related posts:

  1. Hell bent for Leather City
  2. Ah yah kiddin me?
  3. For want of a pahking brake

2 Responses to “My Favorite Things #1 – The City of Leather and Roses”

  1. Kincsem1874

    I love it.

  2. themadblonde

    Ah yes, the love that is almost too embarrassed to speak its name but ultimately doesn’t care enough about the opinions of others to bother to cover it up. Nice filk.

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